Is It A Bribe Or A Reward?

In our Incredible Years class last week we had a discussion about the definition of a bribe vs. reward. How do you define the two?

Carolyn, the founder, said that a bribe is something you offer before the work is done and a reward is given after the work is done.

Example of a Bribe: "You can have this candy if you promise to be good in the store." - parent hands candy over.

Example of a Reward: "If you can talk softly and walk in the library then I'll let you pick out a special movie to take home." - reward is only given if the child follows the simple instructions.

Rewarding your child for work done encourages positive behavior and should be used in conjunction with other positive parenting principles. They are working in our house and I love not feeling guilty about it since it is not a "bribe".

Overheard

Tonight while I was making dinner Beeb came into the kitchen, took a chair and dragged it into the family room. Next I heard her say, "And now it's time for the whoopie dance!" followed by fake flatulence.



At dinner AH said, "I can't believe YOU bought those things for the kids."

15 Minutes

Today we took a walk as a family on a trail near our house. The kiddo's rode their scooters and had fun splashing through the puddles. Early on we heard a sound I can only describe as a roar from the woods around us. AH wondered what it was, I assumed it was a bear. A few minutes later we heard another louder noise which AH told me was thunder as he look behind us to see a massive dark cloud headed our way. Then the sky lit up with lightning closely followed by a huge thunder clap, which had Beeb declaring she wanted to head home, and then the heavens opened. Within a 15 minute period we had lightning, thunder, heavy rain, hail, snow rain mix and wind.

It was fun!

(Sorry Mr. B, I didn't like any of the close-ups I got of you today. I'll do better next time.)

Harvard Day of Faith Panel

This morning I watched an interesting video featuring Rachel Esplin, a 20-year old Mormon at Harvard, taking part in a religious panel. In this segment Rachel was questioned by journalist Sally Quin about the LDS religion. I am impressed with Rachel's knowledge, thoughtful answers and humbleness.

It's definitely worth a view.


Day of Faith: Personal Quests for a Purpose - 3. Rachel Esplin from Harvard Hillel on Vimeo.

Beeb & Mr. B Logic

Last week Beeb announced that Grandpa will be 70 on his next birthday. . . and he would die. I am not sure where the death idea came from but I hope it is not true. Listening to Beeb's announcement and AH's and my chuckling over Beeb's prediction Mr. B chimed in to ask, "Can I have his trains?"

Sorry Mr. B, Grandpa is not going anywhere any time soon AND you'll have to wrestle Uncle T for the trains. :-)

A "little" Crafty

I like to be crafty, but am not creative, so anything crafty I do is an idea I got from someone/somewhere else. I saw this hair clip holder on someone elses blog and thought it was so cute and perfect that I had to make one for Beeb.

Before:



After:



This is going up in Beeb's bathroom. It was super easy and I even tried a glazing technique for the first time. Yeah me!

Snowy March

March started with some beautiful sun and snow for us to enjoy. This past Sunday the kids got up early, dressed themselves into their snow gear and were out sledding before we even had breakfast. I stood on the porch in my pink fuzzy robe and took some pictures. I love how they are now able to do these things for themselves (getting dressed).

THAT'S IT!!!

I've had it. I cannot live with myself if we kill one more goldfish. Today we woke up to Spots II dead in the tank. We only had him for 2 days and I even cleaned out the bowl yesterday to ensure the cleanliness of the bowl and water.

Beeb took the news well. She woke me up this morning saying, "Mama, my goldfish died again. We can get no more goldfish, Jake keeps killing them." I don't know what keeps killing them but I do agree, no more goldfish.

Looks like we are a one pet family. Long live Jake. :-)

Family History

Last year while attending Time Out for Women Mary Ellen Edmunds, one of my most favorite authors, told us about a way she was able to capture her mother's memories without it being overwhelming to her mother. Mary took 100 post cards and on each one wrote a question about her mother's life that she wanted to know but the answers didn't have to be long and overwhelming, they just had to fit on the small space provided. She asked her to answer one a week and then mail it back to Mary.

This idea of hers struck me as something I needed to do with my own mother. Often I feel like I know so little about my mother's life growing up. She has shared some but I know there is so much more to be told.

Because of this nagging sensation I finally (9 months later) did follow Mary's advise and send my mom roughly 15 postcards with a question on each one. Today I was so excited when two of them arrived in the mail.

The first card asked her to tell me one scary/frightening childhood memory. It was so fun to read her attack cat encounter and my grandmother defending her. I giggled at the scene she described as I imagined it in my head (though I know at the time it was very scary for her).

The second card asked her to tell me about some skills she learned from her own mother. This one explained so much about my own childhood. My mom makes great gravy (thank you grandma for passing that on) and we always had dinner together each night as a family. There were a few other things she shared but I won't go into detail here.

To get these in the mail today was like Christmas only better. I was so excited and am looking forward to receiving more postcards from Mom. It is so special to have her memories, in her own handwriting, that I can cherish and share with my own children.

Thanks Mom! These memories are the very best gifts I could ever receive. Love you!!!!!

Saving Money

I don't know if you ever thought about it but some of our household bills are negotiable.

Today I was reading another blog about thriftiness and it mentioned this idea that I have done repeatedly over the years. My favorite bill to negotiate is my phone/DSL bill. About once a year I call my provider and request the same rate that a cheaper competitor offers for the same service (letting them know I will switch providers if they can't make me a better deal). It takes a little finagling but each time I get my DSL fees cut in half for 6 months. So far they haven't given me the half price permanently but at a "limited time offer" rate which is fine with me since I am not wired for the alternative provider, yet.

I have also heard of people doing this with their cable bill. They get the same service for 30% less than what they were paying just by letting the provider know that it is not in their budget to keep such an expensive service unless they can reduce the price but not the service. Negotiate the deal. If you pay $95 each month for cable and they offer you the same package for $75 try for $60. It can't hurt to ask. Of course we only have basic cable which costs me $16.00 per month. Somehow I don't think they are going to negotiate this rate for me.

Spots R.I.P.

Poor Beeb had yet another gold fish die this weekend. That makes two dead in 6 weeks. Secretly I think Jake is killing them (Mr. B's gold fish) but it is probably not nice to point fingers without hard evidence.

I did take this as another opportunity to teach Beeb about the power of prayer. While Spots floated lifelessly in our toilet bowl I was elected to offer up a prayer of gratitude for Spots little life and a request for his safe arrival home (not in my septic field - the other home).

Tomorrow we are off again to the pet store to pick out the next unlucky guppy (with our track record). At the rate we go through fish I am thankful they are a bargain at .14 cents each.

Mid-Winter Break

I think I am addicted to Facebook. Ever since I started my account I have been seriously neglecting my family blog. I am slapping my hand at this very moment; no more neglecting!

So we recently had mid-winter break and no plans. It turned out to be a fabulous week of weather and lots of playing outside. One day we did an outing to the zoo which turned out better than expected as since the carousel was free that day (we road it 3 times in a row) and we discovered the little bird exhibit (of mostly parakeets) that let you hand feed the birds. It was fabulous!











It seemed like everyday our house was the house of choice for the other kids in the neighborhood. It was fun to see them all running around after being cooped up most of the winter. The weather was even nice enough to have a little picnic on our driveway:





I did a little baking of these delicious sugar puffs. These divine french pastries look complicated and yet are super easy and a real crowd favorite. I took a few dozen to New Beginnings and they were devoured. I even had one young man drag his mom over to tell her to "get that recipe". I got my recipe off of the Smitten Kitchen





Here's the recipe (from the Smitten Kitchen):

Makes about two dozen, depending on the size

1 cup (250 ml) water
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 tablespoon sugar
6 tablespoons (90 grams) unsalted butter, cut into small chunks
1 cup (135 gram) flour
4 large eggs, at room temperature

Glaze: 1 egg yolk whisked with 1 teaspoon milk

Toppings: Pearl sugar [see places to buy them at the end] and/or miniature chocolate chips

Preheat the oven to 425°F (220°C). Line a cookie sheet with a reusable nonstick baking mat or parchment paper.

Heat the water, salt, sugar, and butter in a medium saucepan, stirring, until the butter is melted and simmering (low boil). Remove the pot from the heat heat and dump all the flour in at once. Mix vigorously with a wooden spoon until the mixture forms a smooth ball and pulls away from the sides of the pan.

Let the dough cool for five minutes, then briskly beat in the eggs, one at a time, until the dough is smooth and shiny. [At this point you can cover the pot and chill it in the fridge for up to a day.]

Using two spoons, a piping bag fitted with a wide tip, a zip-lock bag with a one-inch corner cut off or a spring-loaded large cookie scoop, pipe or scoop the dough into walnut-sized mounds spaced evenly on the baking sheet.

(If you find your dough to be a bit thin at this point, as you can see mine was in the photos, do not fret. They still puff just fine. And if they don’t, David says he sees bakeries all over Paris selling flat ones, so perhaps you’re just being trendy!)

Brush the top of each mound with some of the egg glaze then press coarse sugar crystals or miniature chocolate chips over the top and sides of each mound. You want to be generous because the puffs will expand a lot, and you’ll want that area to be covered.

Bake the cream puffs for 20 to 35 minutes, or until puffed and well-bronzed. (Yes, this is a rather long range in baking time but I know that in choux recipes especially, baking times can greatly vary depending on the heat of an oven and how fast it browns the top of items. Watch for that nicely bronzed color rather than a precise cooking time.)

Do ahead: Sugar puffs are best the day that they’re made. I find if they’re stored overnight in an airtight container, they get damp on top and the sugar and chips will slide off, though you can easily re-crisp them in the oven If you can deal with them being a bit dryer on day two you can leave them out unwrapped. Chouquettes can also be frozen in a freezer bag for up to a month, and re-crisped in the oven once defrosted. In addition, you can store the unpiped/scooped dough in the fridge for up to a day.