Beeb Logic: Gutters

Ah yes, another dose of Beeb logic (we're long overdue).

On the drive to church today Beeb said to me, "Mom, you know how your teeth are attached to your gutters. . ."

"You're gutters?" I inquired on the verge of laughter as I look over at AH.

"Yes your gutters." she responded.

"You means your gums?" I reply back to her.

"Oh yeah, your gums. Well you know how your teeth are attached to your gums? My gums are really soft and slimy."

Good to know Beeb. (she says the funniest things, that girl!)

Out Of The Mouth Of Babes

Mr. B's friend was over during lunch today. Before he started eating I reminded Mr. B of what he was supposed to do and he quickly prayed over his meal.

Afterward his friend said to Mr. B, "We don't pray before we eat. I know you do but we don't."

Mr. B responded, "Maybe you could remind your family to do it. They will be blessed if they do."

My heart is very content right now. :-)

The Pressure Washer Shower

Tonight AH returned home after a full day of motorcycling the back country trails with his buddy. As I passed by a window I heard the kids laughing and I looked out to see them all wet (still fully clothed) while AH was pressure washing his bike. The kiddo's are yelling at him and then I see him turn the hose on the kids (I promise, it wasn't too close or powerful enough to do harm). I guess the kids needed a quick spray down too - that's one way of getting them clean.

Why Pornography is Wrong (It's Not Really About Sex)

Often times I read things and have many thoughts about them that I want to share or express but for some such reason or another I am not fully able. Tonight I came across a post on this very sensitive subject that really speaks to my understanding of it in a way that I doubt I could ever put so well. Thanks SilverRain for sharing your insite (and the rest of your blog - I really love reading it!).


The Rains Came Down: Why Pornography is Wrong (It's Not Really About Sex)

I have recently gone through a drastic paradigm shift that has led me to understand several gospel principles in a new way. One of these is pornography.

There is a great deal of discussion about pornography in the LDS blog world. At the risk of oversimplification, essentially the discussions involve three basic views. First, that pornography is evil because it exploits women and plays upon natural man drives. Second, that pornography in moderation is not that bad if it helps husbands and wives have a more fulfilling sex life. Third, that there is really nothing wrong with pornography because the women who are depicted choose their careers, and would do it whether or not any particular person used it.

But there is another, more insidious aspect to pornography that I believe may greatly damage the lives of anyone it touches in ways that ripple out to destroy wives, children and friends.

While I have not ever been involved in pornography, there is a certain level of it which cannot be entirely avoided in today's society, so I am minimally familiar with the concept. Generally speaking, pornography involves showing people in various states of undress, or depicting a sexual encounter through stories, but nakedness and sex are not what defines pornography. In fact, pornography can consist of people entirely modestly dressed, and often does. Sometimes an actual sexual encounter does not even need to be depicted or described. Pornography is not nakedness, it is the depiction of forbidden or unattainable sexual desires in a way that allows the viewer or reader to direct the fulfillment of those desires.

When a person views a pornographic picture or reads a pornographic story, they are in some ways putting themselves into the scene. They are able to fantasize about doing something that they cannot do in real life. Essentially all forms of pornography involve having someone else do what you want them to do.

In short, pornography is a way of finding sexual gratification that circumvents the agency of another person. It is about control, not about sex.

In normal, healthy, husband-and-wife sex, two people have to work together to find mutual pleasure and joy in physical expression. That's why it is such hard work, and why so many people struggle with it. It is not that there is anything wrong with the individuals, it is that divinely-sanctioned sex is not meant to be easy. It is not meant to be about fulfilling one's own needs, it is meant to be about seeking ways to meet a spouse's needs. When two people attempt this, there are bound to be missteps along the way. However, when this is done, husband and wife form strong bonds of love as they seek their spouse's needs before their own (very powerful) ones. Sex should be a form of charity held sacred to be performed only between husband and wife, so there can be a bond between them that no others share.

When a person seeks physical fulfillment in ways that ignore the agency of another person, they objectify and thus can manipulate a person (even if it is only in their own fantasy, and even if it is on a strictly limited basis). That person mocks one of the most important laws of God: the law of agency. They then damage their ability to find pleasure in giving, grinding grooves of habit that make it impossible for them to associate sex with selflessness.

Once a person ties their sexual pleasure to control and manipulation, other aspects of the marital relationship assume the taint of a need to control. Then that person can easily begin to see all relationships as relationships of control. When a relationship is about control, it is no longer of God.

If you look at scripture, about Satanic interaction with mankind as compared to divine interaction, you will see that relationships with God never, never violate the principle of agency: of choice and accountability. Satan almost always tempts in one of three ways: by convincing us there is no choice, by convincing us there is no consequence, or by telling us that we do not have to be accountable for what we choose, that it somehow isn't our fault.

Is pornography wrong because it exploits women? Undoubtedly. But it also exploits the viewer or reader, teaching them that joy comes only from control. In the end, that is far more damaging.

Finding Spiritual Inspiration

A goal I have this year is to grow more spiritually, whether by reading the Scriptures, reading or listening to talks given by church leaders, listening to hymns and reading of there history, through gospel discussions with others, etc. There are so many ways for me to work toward my goal.

This week I decided that I wanted to listen to Music and the Spoken Word as it has been announced that the program will be inducted into the Radio Hall of Fame later this year. When I went to the website for it I had missed that day's broadcast by a few hours and couldn't find any way to hear past episodes.

I was disappointed but not discouraged. I perused my way around the Church radio website and came across a wonderful gem. The Church has a radio program called "Conversations" that interviews people of insterest to those of our faith (and by that I mean Christian, not necessarily just LDS).

Deciding to give it a try I listened to an interview of Elder David A. Bednar and Sister Susan Bednar by Sherry Dew. The beginning started out okay as I listened while editing pictures but then about a third of the way through the interview the conversation topic really caught hold of me and from there on I was so enraptured that I actually had to repeat several sections of it so I could take notes. It was, in essence, like having Time Out for Women, EFY, Women's Conference, Youth Conference, etc. right in my own home. When the hour was up I was sad for it to have ended; my heart and soul begged for more.

Tonight I repeated this experience and listed to an interview of Elder Richard G. Scott and his daughter Linda Scott Mickle. Once again I found myself pausing to hear incredibly profound thoughts, laugh at some of their life experiences and felt nourished to my very core, as I am sure was meant to happen. I wanted to pause and call friends who are going through incredibly hard trials and say, "I just heard Elder Scott speak of your trial, a trial he went through as well, and he shared his views on it and I was moved. Please go and listen to it, I think it will uplift you and give you strength." Then I decided I want all my friends and family to have this opportunity because I think we can all be edified by it, thus the blog posting.

The program is called Conversations and can be found HERE. Take an hour to listen, to know more of those who guide us in a way that is as if they are sitting in your own living room talking, relaxed and giving you a side of themselves that is so much more personal.

Conversations features interviews with people of interest to the LDS community—General Authorities, Auxiliary leaders, and faithful Latter-day Saints. Some are joined by their spouses, who contribute an additional dimension. Each has an interesting story and a unique perspective. These discussions are done in a style which allows the listener to become acquainted with those being interviewed in an informal way. This is particularly interesting with the featured general authorities, who are known to most only in formal settings. Conversations offers advice, wisdom and interesting stories that will lift your spirit and inspire your thoughts.

The Seed Finally Did Take Root

My MIL is an amazing woman. Dedicated to her family, she always inspires me with her example of charity, faith, devotion and love.

For AH's birthday this year she included a sweet little gem of an article that she originally cut out of the Seattle Times on October 14, 1973 by Erma Bombeck and was titled "The Seed Finally Did Take Root." (Originally published in 1971 under the title "The Green, Green Grass of Home") This humorous story brought several chuckles from me as I read it and realized how befitting it was for her third child (my husband).

Maybe you have one of these types in your family or perhaps you are married to one like I am; either way enjoy.

The seed finally did take root

When Mike was 3 he wanted a sandbox and his father said, “There goes the yard. We’ll have kids over here day and night and they’ll throw sand into the flower beds and cats will make a mess in it and it’ll kill the grass for sure.”

And Mike’s mother said, “It’ll come back.”

When Mike was 5, he wanted a jungle gym set with swings that would take his breath away and bars to take him to the summit and his father said, “Good grief, I’ve seen those things in back yards and do you know what they look like? Mud holes in a pasture. Kids digging their gym shoes into the ground. It’ll kill the grass.”

And Mike’s mother said, “It’ll come back.”

BETWEEN BREATHES when Daddy was blowing up the plastic swimming pool he warned, “You know that they’re going to do to this place? They’re going to condemn it and use it for a missile site. I hope you know what you’re doing. They’ll track water everywhere and you’ll have a million water fights and you won’t be able to take out the garbage without stepping in mud up to your neck and when we take this down we’ll have the only brown lawn on the block.”

“It’ll come back,” smiled Mike’s mother.

When mike was 12, he volunteered his yard for a camp out.

As they hoisted the tents and drove in the spikes his father stood at the window and observed. “Why don’t I just put the grass seed out in cereal bowls for the birds and save myself the trouble of spreading it around. You know for a fact that those tents and all those big feet are going to trample down every single blade of grass, don’t you? Don’t bother to answer," he said. "I know what you're going to say, “It'll come back?”

THE BASKETBALL hoop on the side of the garage attracted more crowds than the Winter Olympics. And a small patch of lawn that started out. With a barren spot the size of a garbage-can lid soon grew to encompass the entire side yard.

Just when it looked like the new seed might take root, the winter came and the sled runners beat it into ridges and Mike's father shook his head and said, "I never asked for much in this life. . . only a patch of grass.

And his wife smiled and said, "It'll come back."

The lawn this year was beautiful. It was green and alive and rolled out like a sponge carpet along the drive where gym shoes had trod . . . along the garage where bicycles used to fall . . . and around the flower beds where little boys used to dig with iced tea spoons.

But Mike’s father never saw it. He anxiously looked beyond the yard and asked with a catch in his voice, "He will come back, won't he?"

The NEW Encyclopedia of Handguns & Small Arms

Mr. B has always been obsessed with guns. AH has repeatedly assured me that this is perfectly natural for a boy (and yet I still feel uneasy about it). Today I put my foot down. I refused to let Mr. B take his latest library book into church to read:



I mean seriously what kind of mother would I be if I had let him? Of course AH noticed it on the front seat of his truck when we left. I told him it was a better theft deterrent than a car alarm (and cheaper too). Who on Earth would break into a car that is obviously owned by a gun fanatic?

Torchlight Run

Last night turned out to be a perfect night for the Torchlight Run. I joined several friends in this event and we all had a great time.

I was extremely anxious about this race due to the fact that I hadn't run at all since a race in early June. Having the kiddo's home all day has really put a damper on getting in the miles. Of course I could always wake up before the crack of dawn to run (yeah right!) or go in the evening after they go to bed (yeah right!) but my preferred running time of day is mid morning and it just hasn't been happening. I set my goal for this run to just finish without walking.

In the beginning I kept pace with my friend Ms. G. It was a bit frustrating because we started near the end of the pack of participants so we spent a good deal of time having to weave in and out, trying to get around the slower participants. That was really annoying and I think my time would have been significantly better had we not had to do this (I've never run in a race with 5000 participants before - lesson learned: get up near the front at all costs before the race starts).

Just before the halfway mark (my turn around point, Ms. G went on to do the 8K) I broke ahead of my friend and felt surprisingly good. My body felt loose and nicely warmed up and my feet felt fantastic, which was wonderful considering I haven't ran barefoot in over 6 weeks (I am paying for it a bit today, but not nearly as much as I had expected).

At the halfway turn things really got nice as the crowd of runners were significantly dispersed and it was much easier to maneuver around them. I generally stuck to the inside and even enjoyed jumping a few orange lane cones. I could feel the excitement of the run within myself. I really loved being out there and was cruising past everyone. There were a few people who tried to challenge me a bit but I had no problem increasing my tempo and the gap between us.

Toward the very end (last 1/2 mile) the air was semi-stagnant and I could feel a blister on my big toe forming. I looked over to my left and spotted another friend, Ms. S, cruising out of the tunnel that the 8K'ers route took them through. She looked great, we greeted each other and then she quickly passed me (I can't wait to see how she did for her overall time and within her age division - she's a quick one!). It was perfect timing, she inspired me keep it up and finish strong; just what I needed right then. Overall at this point I was still surprised at how good I felt and at how I was easily running several minutes faster than my normal pace despite the mild foot discomfort and no soothing breeze.

Just before the final turn a woman, who I had passed earlier, made a break to go around me. It took me by surprise and as she passed my old sprinting mentality/competitiveness kicked in. At this point I could hear one of the race volunteers encouraging us to take the turn "nice and wide" and I literally though, "Screw you. That is so stupid." I hit the corner hard and on the narrow inside and booked it to the end (easily passing the other woman before the turn). It wasn't my fastest sprint but it was solid and surprised me that I had that much energy left after not having trained in so long.

I don't know my final time, due to my timing chip falling off near the start of the run, but I know it was better than the race in June which really surprised me because I felt that race the entire time (running with a friend at a pace faster than I normally run) and this time I just felt great the whole way. I've emailed the race people to see if they can work a miracle on my behalf and figure out my time based on my bib number but I won't hold my breath.

Upon reflection I realized that my conditioning (what little I had) is all due to ultimate frisbee. AH and I started playing it every Thursday night with friends earlier this summer. I guess that 90 minutes of running even one day a week did pay off for me in the end. Imagine what I could do if I trained seriously?

The Rattlesnake Climb

I have some seriously fun friends and yet quite a few are also a little demented as well. Take my friend Ms. J (I have several by this name but "you" know who you are!) as an example. Ms. J had a baby just 8 weeks ago (that's 8 WEEKS AGO) and this week decided that she wanted to climb a small mountain with her 5 year old and 8 week old in tow. Somehow she persuaded me and another friend to come along with her and include our kids just to make the trip even more enjoyable (because you know how much my kids love to hike up mountains!).

The weather for the day turned out to be stunningly perfect and thanks to my GPS (see how I've already claimed AH's birthday present) the kids were so enthralled with the hunt for treasure at the top of the mountain that they did the climb beautifully and with minimal whining.

Note super cute picture of Ms. J and her kiddos smiling beautifully for the camera:


Note my kiddo's and their faces (and this was the best of 3 shots!):


The descent turned out to be much harder than the climb. Lots of tired, whining kids and lots of falling and getting scraped up, and a scary fly that tormented Beeb and Mr. B. Alas we made it to the bottom intact and exhausted and as a treat to ourselves we had a nice Thai lunch wherein Mr. B quickly ate his food and then proceeded to lay down and fall asleep in the restaurant!

It was a great day and a great hike with great friends.

On a side note my questionably sane friend, Ms. J, is running a 5K race with me tonight (that's 8 WEEKS after having a baby).

Geocaching

Earlier this month while vacationing with AH's family we took part in a couple of Geocache hunts with his brother. This isn't the first time we've done this fun technology treasure hunt but it is the first time it has occurred to us that it would be a fun way to hike with our family (because we are sharp like that, it only took a couple of years to sink in).

So for AH's birthday I bought him a gently used GPS and we've had a wonderful time trying it out (more to come on this subject as I update our July adventures). Today I downloaded the coordinates for some nearby caches and we took our neighbor and her girls with us on the hunt. We found 5 caches in all and my neighbor even found $100 lying on the ground until Mr. B confessed it was some money he took from me and it fell out of his pocket during a tantrum (probably no more on this but serious consequences to be had later today).

All in all I am totally hooked; just what I need another addicting hobby.

Beef Stew

Beeb requested a bath this morning. While washing her hair some mysterious bubbles floated up to the surface. Beeb announced that she had tooted (obviously). "Or sometimes I call it beef stew,", she told me, "because it is funny."

Indeed.

We're Home

Well we are home from a nice vacation. We got to enjoy the lake, sunshine, boating and playing with all of AH's family.

I am still so refreshed that I actually put all our trip gear away today, the day after we got home - not 2 week from now like I normally do, but within 24 hours of returning home! THAT is a sign of a good vacation.